Reincarnation Scene- Rewrite

11/22/15: This post is over 3 years old, are you sure you want to continue? *Most opinions listed below have most likely changed.

Okay, Lesson #1- Never post a story from your 7th grade notebook without rewriting it first. This is a rewrite of that old Reincarnation/Alpha Academy chapter since I wasn’t satisfied with it. Ugh, Last year’s writing. 

Sasha POV

The rain poured down, making my clothes and dark hair cling to my skin. I was standing in the courtyard, spear in hand, letting myself get soaking wet. I wasn’t wearing any armor which, in my opinion, was pretty stupid. I was looking for something- Something to fight.

“I’ve finally found you, Girl.” Or someone.

“Ares,” I snarled, staring him down intensely.

“You’ve got something of mine, Girl,” He said, “And I want it back.”

“I told you,” I said, “It’s in the Armory where it belongs.”

“I didn’t find it there,” He said walking closer to me, “Look at that hair of yours. I’m sure you wore it. Or you haven’t figured out that hairbrush yet. Is that the case, Girl?”

“Look,” I said, “I don’t know where your helmet is, Okay? Just- Just leave, Please?”

“I remember you said you’d fight me for it,” He took another step closer to me, “Isn’t that true?”

“Y-yes,” I said, taking a step back, “And fight I will…”

“How cute, The little goddess wants to fight the god of war. Bad choice, Girl.”

“I-I,” I stuttered , “I can fight you. And…And I can win.”

I charged, and the sound of wood knocking against wood echoed through the courtyard.

Before I knew what was going on, I was disarmed and backed into a corner, my weapon far out of reach.

“I told you it was a bad idea,” Ares said, triumphantly pointing the spear at me where I couldn’t move, “Now, How am I gonna finish you off?”

“Ares,” Selene’s voice scolded as she came into view, “Don’t do that to your sister!”

Looks like I did win.

Selene walked over to me and knelt down next to the corner I was still backed into. Better give her a good show.

I wedged myself further back into the corner and pretended to shiver, giving her the most pathetic look I could muster.

“Oh,” She gushed, “Look at you, all wet. Poor thing.”

“But-She… She charged at me,” Ares said, “She should get in trouble, too.”

Selene ignored what he had just said and was attempting to coax me out of my corner. I made myself tremble and look frightened. Surely she’d buy it and wouldn’t punish me.

“Poor Athena,” She said, wrapping something around me,  “Let’s get you dry, Okay?”

I stood up slowly, watching Ares like he would jump me if I decided to turn away.

“It’s okay,dear,” Selene said, brushing a chunk of my wet hair away from my face, “He won’t hurt you.”

Mission Accomplished.

~

Kyle POV

I was in trouble. Selene ratted me out and turned me into my parents.

“But the girl charged at me,” I protested, “And stole my helmet, which she said she’d fight me for.”

“I have never heard the pathetic creature utter a word,” Mother said, “Though she was wearing your helmet earlier.”

“Athena speaks to me all the time,” Father chimed in, “And I don’t think she’d do such a thing.”

“Then explain to me why she never speaks to me!”

“Maybe you frighten her. You seem to enjoy screaming at her.”

“I do not frighten her- and she enjoys being disrespectful.”

“Why does she always search for an escape route when you enter the room, then?”

They began to argue and I slipped out of the room only to run into the girl I was trying to stay away from.

“What do you want, Girl,” I asked, “Wasn’t getting me in trouble enough?”

Her gray eyes were glued to the floor, “I-I found your helmet,” She held it out to me, “You left it in the Courtyard… Underneath the tree.”

“I tried to hurt you,” I said, “And you’re still giving it back? We don’t do that here. It’s a stupid choice.”

She looked up at me and held the object out- shaking it like, ‘Here, take it,’.

‘Stupid girl,’ I thought, reaching for it.

“No,” She said, jerking the helmet away, “I think I’ll keep it.”

I’d been tricked.

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2 thoughts on “Reincarnation Scene- Rewrite

    1. I know, if I find a writing piece from last year, or even several months ago, I’ll be like, ‘Oh my gosh, this is awful- Why did I used to think this was good? REWRITE!’

      Thanks. (:

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