Writing Improvement. [Total Boredom]

11/22/15: This post is over 3 years old, are you sure you want to continue? *Most opinions listed below have most likely changed.

Even though I can’t follow a plot to save my life, I have much better writing skills than I did last year . Grammar and the use of more descriptive words improved a lot and I have a better vocabulary. And I know what paragraphing is, which makes this story easier to read. Check out the samples. The storyis part of Camile’s Story.

Last Year:  I was sitting in my room with Cat. Well,our room. Cat and I share a room now. We were really bored,and were looking for something to do. “Hey,you wanna go downstairs?” Cat asked walking toward the door. “Sure” I said following her.After we got downstairs,I saw Bast eating Cookeh’s Kitten Chow.  “Bast what are you-” I began “Hey,that’s Cookeh’s!”  “Sorry” Bast said with her mouth full of Kitten food. Wow,My life is weirder than I thought. “Mom!” Cat said “That’s so embarassing!”  “Okay Bast,”I said “we’ll have fish tonight. IF you stay away from Cookeh’s food.” Bast’s eyes lit up “Deal!” She said walking away from the food bowl.

“Uh,Camile”Cat said “maybe we should go back upstairs.”   “But,you just came from upstairs!” Bast said

“Uh,”I said thinking up a quick lie “we’re gonna do our hair” “Okay,” Bast said “have fun!”

We quickly walked up the stairs and shut the door.

This Year[Same Scenario]:

Cat and I were sitting in our room, and were looking for something to cure our boredom.

“Hey, you wanna go downstairs and see if our parents need help with anything?” Cat asked, getting up off the floor, and headed toward the door.

“Sure, Sounds great.” I said following behind her.

After we got downstairs, I saw Bastet eating Cookeh’s Cat food.

“Bastet, What are you-” I began , “Ew, Gross; That’s Cookeh’s!”

“Sorry” Bastet said with her mouth full of Cat food.

‘Wow,’ I thought, ‘My life just keeps getting weirder…’

“Mom!” Cat whined, noticing what Bastet was doing,”That’s so embarrassing!”

“Okay Bastet,”I said “If you stay away from Cookeh’s food; we’ll have fish for dinner tonight.”

“Deal!” Bastet exclaimed, eyes lighting up with excitement. She backed away from the food bowl.

“Hey Camile,”Cat said “Can we go back upstairs?”

“But you just came from there…” Bastet pointed out.

“We were going to Uh, Do our hair,” I said, coming up with a quick lie.

“Just remember to come down for dinner, Okay?” Dad said from his spot in the kitchen.

We  ran up the stairs and shut the door to my room behind us.


6 thoughts on “Writing Improvement. [Total Boredom]

  1. Both of them are fabulous!! You are MUCH too humble, you can totally follow a plot!

    They’re both great, but I can see what you mean!! The second one is even MORE awesome!!

    If you keep writing, you’ll be like Rick Riordan (Or better!) before you know it!!

Comment on this Post

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s