more introspection!

i dunno about you guys, but when i look back on the characters i used to make for these stories i see… pretty clear self inserts. I mean COME ON:

areyoukiddingme

I’ll be darnged if that ain’t just highschool me.

Untitled-3*

I’ve also realized that I used to make said characters… SUPER boring. I had a lot of self esteem issues and had trouble looking at myself as an empowered person.

I mean, perfect example is just comparing old Nireth to even my revamp from 2 years ago:

img_2772

Back when I was writing her in middle/high school she was super lame and cool stuff just kind of… happened around her. She never had any real agency.nirethupd8

6 years later I gave her an axe, an objective, and a real personality.

Now, I have either gotten over that self-consciousness–or at least come to understand myself a little better, and it’s just weird to look back on how I used to see myself.

How about you guys? Do you think making empowered characters helped you be more confident? And if you could re-write those character bios, what would you write now?

 

*would also like to note that this photo is PRE-FROZEN. ANNA copied ME!!

 

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oversharing

so, if you didn’t know, I’m old

like full blown adult almost 22 old

and through watching some people very close to me i’ve started to remember that growing up is… really freakin’ hard. and it SUCKS.

Now i’m not talking about the “growing up” that’s like “oh i only wear grey now and watch exclusively lifetime movies–UNIRONICALLY–because those things are made for adults and also nerf guns suck”.

More like… just figuring out where you fit in the world. Figuring out how to handle pressure when you’re suddenly 800% accountable for your actions. Takin’ care of business–by yourself.

and i just wanted to let you guys know that if there’s ANYTHING i can offer you by way of advice–maybe not even life stuff ask me about art or storyboarding i’ll talk at you for 3 hours even though i’m severely unqualified–feel free to ask. because i’ve been to the bad places, but I’m doing pretty great now (mentally, i mean) and if I could help even a little it would mean a lot! 🙂

bored and procrastinating

this feels like highschool except my “homework” is finishing drawings so I can GET A JOB SOME DAY

and i just realized that my thesis main character is just a slight evolution of Nireth (this time featuring magical axe!)

grunhild_turnaroundxpressions

but i guess it’s nothing new as my viking obsession started when i was 5 and my mom got me a kids’ book about ancient civilizations

I was basically sick all winter break and it was a real big revisitation of childhood stuff. I watched old youtube horror game lets’ plays and even played a little poptropica!

I also did some writing because i took a lot of nyquill and expected funny results (like my bronchitis script… but that’s another story for another day.) but instead just ended up writing a story i’m actually really fond of! i’ll probably post it here since my other blog is kind of accidentally turning into an industry advice/personal blog.

SO MAYBE CHECK BACK IN AND SEE YOU SOON WE’LL SEE

Graduation!

In this post, I talk about how excited I was about graduating Jr. High. 4 years later, I’m talking about how relieved I am that a little over 24 hours ago, I graduated High School.

Walking across the (rickety, mildly horrifying) stage extension in low, chunky heels because God forbid I catch a stiletto in the gap between the stage and its extension. I have great legs I’d love to keep them. and getting my diploma was the happiest I’ve been in years. I wish that was a dramatic exaggeration.

The “best” 4 years of my life came with a lot of struggles. I lost a lot of friends, and sadly, I had a majority of them for years, some since grade school. I said very few words to them at graduation, and I doubt I’ll say very many more in the future. I wasn’t in a good place mentally, either. I spent too many nights at my absolute worst, ugly crying on the bathroom floor at ungodly hours of the night, thinking of doing things to myself that I hope never come up as an option again. (That unintentionally sounds like the “edgy” teenage type…)

I made some really good memories. Going to dances, staying out late, sitting in a hot tub at 2:30 AM, trying not to ruin the hair and makeup your mom paid the salon to do. I did the play/musical every year, and I stayed in Band. I was also an honors graduate, keeping a 3.5 GPA every semester. I wore my medal for hours after the ceremony. I’m grateful for the memories, but I don’t miss anything about them.

High School was not a good time in my life, but I’m accepting of  the way it changed me. I don’t think High School should be the “best four years of your life”. It’s also nothing like the movies or TV shows try portraying it. I think it’s a time when you’re supposed to figure things out. I walked into High School a terrified 14 year old girl , and I walked out as a completely different 18 year old. (I’m glad I got to be that 14 year old for a while, though. You have to start somewhere) Am I a bit scared of the future? Absolutely, but I know that I can handle whatever tries to bring me down.

Anybody up for a little group storytelling?

i have a LOT on my plate this summer, but I’m craving a fun, fluffy summer project!

Anyone wanna make a character for a webcomic?

All I know so far is it includes Leap and Pip, two royal kids who hang out together and solve mysteries/fight bad guys. Leap’s from the winter kingdom, Pip’s from the summery one, and they’re best friends! Also a recurring bad guy is Professor Doombringer, but haven’t drawn him yet cuz i’m currently finishing up a li’l project!

Totally open to there being other kingdoms/species of character/even having these dudes not be the main characters!

hm

funny coincidences!

I work at a Adobe and Tech help desk at USC, and we get some questions about wordpress sometimes. One girl came in with some URL issues, and I was trying to show her what a normal post permalink should look like and I was like oh god, what’s a wordpress site I could use?

dogs.wordpress.com

That was me, tryin’ my best.

I’m also trying to do some daily sketches! Idk if I should post them all here cuz that feels spammy, but I just like STOPPED drawing because of thesis panic. We just pitched today (Mine got approved!!) and it’s a relief to have the pressure off… but still, there’s a very long way to go.

So here’s day 1. Sorry world.

oops